Fruits of my Mission

Today in my Book of Mormon class, we were discussing what would be considered a successful missionary. Also, I was looking at a web site that someone put up on the church in Thailand and I was amazed at all the actual churches that have been built since I was there. When I was in Thailand in 1983, there was only 1 church and that was in Bangkok. The other branches met in buildings but they weren't specifically built as a church. It made me realize that though I wasn't one of the first missionaries in Thailand, I was still a pioneer, helping the church to gradually grow there.

Sometimes when I have reflected on my mission, it was a great experience for me, but I do sometimes wonder if I did any good. I only saw a few people come into the church as a result of my service there, and I don't know how strong they were and if they have stayed faithful.

But in the class today, we were reading a scripture in Alma:

Alma 26: 27
27 Now when our hearts were depressed, and we were about to turn back, behold, the Lord comforted us, and said: Go amongst thy brethren, the Lamanites, and bear with patience thine afflictions, and I will give unto you success.

Sis. Wilson said we need to redefine what we consider "success". It is more than having actual converts. It is showing God our willingness to do what He tells us to do. So that made me decide to make a list of what I feel were the best experiences of my mission, the "fruits" of my mission, if you will.

1. The way I felt when I was trying to ignore the spiritual promptings that I should go on a mission. It was not comfortable and was very hard to do!

2. Even with these spiritual promptings, it was still very challenging to step into the dark and turn in my mission papers. It was very much a leap of faith for me. I was scared to death. I still remember the calm, reassuring, peaceful feeling I had as I walked home from church after handing my papers to the bishop. I knew at that point that I was doing something Heavenly Father wanted me to do. This strong feeling sustained me through many hard times on my mission when I wanted to give up. Even when I think of it today, I can still remember the force of that feeling. Therefore, when I think of that feeling I know was from God, then I guess I served the mission I was supposed to, even though I didn't seem to accomplish much.

3. The first day I was called to serve in the Phanat Nikhom Refugee Camp, I observed Pat Barica teaching a class of Hmong children. They were notorious for being dirty, rambunctious, wild children. Pat had combed and fixed their hair and washed their faces and played classical music. As I saw them there, in my mind's eye, I could see them all in white and I realized that God didn't see them as wild, dirty, and rambunctious. He saw them as His children with the divine nature inside each of them to become as He is. I saw them as God saw them. I felt His love for them. This is one of the most sacred experiences of my life.

4. I had only been in the country about a month, when my trainer, Sister Record, had to go out of the country for a few days to renew her visa. I was assigned a Thai companion while she was gone. We were supposed to go visit a member, Radsamii. I was the only one who knew where she lived. I felt pretty confident that I could find the right place to get off the bus. As we were going, the bus got quite crowded as they tend to do. I hadn't counted on that. I couldn't see out the bus. How could I see where to get off the bus when I couldn't even see out? I was panic-stricken. As a "green" missionary, you try so hard to actually be useful. Here was something I could actually do and people were counting on me. I couldn't see out. I didn't know what else to do but offer up a humble, silent prayer for help. Just as I finished my prayer, someone got up and I got their seat. I was able to look out just in time to see the landmarks that told me we needed to get off at the next stop. We were able to get off in the right place and get to Radsamii's house. Not being able to speak the language well, I wasn't much help when we got there, but my companion was able to speak and give comfort and help. Heavenly Father answered my humble prayer and get this new member the help she needed.

5. I left the country and, particularly, the refugee camp, with such a profound love for the people that it broke my heart to leave.

As I think of more experiences, I will post them here. But, really, these are the main strong memories I have of my mission. Though they are very meaningful to me, they don't seem like your typical mission stories that you hear others give. I don't know how much help I was to others, but I do know that I was supposed to be there.